A Giant’s Quest will be an occasional biographic entry about my life as a quote unquote giant. Some entries will involve stories that directly involve my height but most likely it will involve lots of nerdisms.
It has been a common misconception that all tall people are recluses, who only move in concentrated packs of impending terror. It is an even more common misconception that that tall people, mainly tall women, are stuck up bitches that looked down on everyone, though I suppose literally they do but really I speaking of this in terms of the stuck up cow-whore-bitch who thinks she is better than everyone. But I digress, to stand at a whopping six feet one inch is quite the spectacle, I’ll admit, I can only imagine the kind of shock or surprise rather at seeing someone, a girl no less, walk up to you and cast a shadow over your entire body. I suppose it would be the equivalent of me meeting a particularly lanky basketball player and feeling like I could probably climb him like a tree.
Going through life, from pre-k to high school to college I have always garnered the same greeting from nearly every person “Your tall” as if today was my first day of existence and I hadn’t realized the statured I had sustain or I have long term memory loss and can’t seem to remember that I am in fact of an almost giant like height. This is followed by brief gawking and then them possibly asking me to grab something from a high place or asking me a follow up question how tall I am exactly, all pretty standard stuff. But it is to my utter shock and even sadness to find that on my meeting of some, and for all I know all people, they find me intimidating! Me! One of the least intimidating, non-confrontational, head in book reading, kitty loving people you’ll ever meet! But alas I find that my mere presence strikes a kind of fear in them.
No wonder I’m single. I can see clearly now that I am bar room poison, it also makes me realize the courage it must take the guys that do hit on me. I can see it clearly now in my head, their I am standing with my friends, chatting it up, having a good time and from across then a person of the male breed has spotted and is in utter awe of my bouncy hair and sky high legs (this is all hypothetical of course, as if I have a social life) he is enamored, absolutely stuck by me and fells he has to make his move! But then all of a sudden as he is working up his nerve to approach me he stops dead in his tracks. His mind is racing; nonstop information is coursing through his head. Who is he kidding? Why would this girl ever give him the time of day? Clearly someone with that kind of waspy demeanor would never look at him twice or friend zone him in an instant! He retracts back to his former position and gives up on the idea of ever speaking to this woman. Ever.
This to me is absolutely, positively awful, terrible, and depressing. For the record I’m not a stuck up bitch and over the years, despite what people around me say, I’ve come to grips with the fact that I’ll mostly likely end up with someone slightly to substantially shorter than me, and that’s ok, seriously. It’s all about the confidence a person gives off, it says everything. If you have confidence and equal intelligence and a sense of humor the game is on! No matter your height, after all of that it turns in to nothing but an afterthought. I actually once meet a shorter guy who told me every time he saw a taller girl he saw it as a challenge and that’s the way it should be. A challenge.
So I’m tall, no other word quite says it the same. I’m tall and there is nothing short of slouching that can change that, but hey such is life. This is my life and this is my journey through the metaphorical clouds and I’m laying it all out to see.